Monday, June 11, 2007

Doors


So, I wonder if the saying is a little backwards. Maybe it isn't "when one door closes another one opens." I'm thinking in my life today it is more of "when one door opens it isn't that bad when the other door closes." Oh hell, forget it. It is bad. I just lost a group of friends. I would like to think my blogging might replace that group of online friends but that door closed swiftly and this door is slowly edging open.

It is almost odd to me that I am so invested in a group of people whom I have never met in real life. I belonged to the group for at least 2 years and I've stuck it out through some knock down drag out fights. I've never once left the group. Other people would act as if the group had a revolving door. Shout their displeasure, be gone for two weeks and come back. I've always been annoyed at them for that. Take a stand and stick with it. That is why I have never left. I have never been that invested in any argument to know I couldn't resolve it and happily stay a member. I have now left though and in doing so I have also left behind many friends that I will miss. In the commotion of things I'm sure I lost a friend that I've known since before I even got pg with my 7 year old - she is the one friend I have met in real life. That's a lot of history. That's a lot of sadness. And for the record I am completely devestated.

You may wonder why I chose to let it all out here. That's because I'm a closet computer user. I prefer my outside friends not to know that I spend my hours at home playing online games, chatting at online parenting sights, blogging, and shopping(this is legitimate though and I'll save that for another blog). I don't even share all of my online hobbies with my husband. He doesn't know I've started this blog. He knows I am in an online group - however this morning I didn't tell him I left it. I don't discuss my online friends with him - even though he has had the occasional meeting when them playing online games as well. I just enjoy having this piece of my life that is all mine - that I don't share.

5 comments:

Christine said...

Change is always hard, but it can be a real good thing!
I've met some really nice friends blogging.I hope you enjoy blogging as much as I do!

Emma in Canada said...

It seems odd that we come to depend on these people we haven't met in real life. And yet, it's just a different level of friendship. I hope blogging brings you some good friends.

MarmiteToasty said...

Can you not still be maties with the special handful that you wish to keep contact with?

I left 'The Gloomies' a sight I frequented, cos of the bullshit and insane loons that lived there, but I keep in contact with the handful of special true maties that I found there and some I have met.......

Do what you think is best and know in your soul is what YOU need....

x

Mom not Mum said...

Thanks for all your comments. Marmite-you're right on - it will just take a little bit more work now but in my spare time I think I can handle it. LOL

ciara said...

i'm not smart enough to leave 'the gloomies' as marmy has. i still go in there on occasion albeit not as frequently. i keep asking myself why when ultimately i get bored, or I get sick of the games that ppl are playing with those they don't even really know.

i'm sorry that you are losing your friend. always hard. i'm sure everything will turn out for the best in the end. xoxo